This is Ten Years

On Tuesday morning, I was so stressed out I was in tears. My husband had unwittingly booked to be in several places at the same time. I was litterally running (which is not pretty at 33 weeks pregnant) to get to places on time. This is on top of a stressful Sunday trying to get out of the house on time for a family party, and an even more stressful Monday where I felt like I was nothing more than an unappreciated secretary and housekeeper.

By Tuesday night, my frustration had subsided and I was nursing a major sinus infection. My husband, the one I wanted to strangle in his sleep earlier in the day, took both the kids out of the house so I could rest, did almost all the bath and bed routine by himself, helped me research different medicines I could take for my sinuses, and then ran to get the medication at 8:30 at night because we had nothing in the house I could take.

And that, my friends, sums up what marriage is like after ten years.

It’s easy to get stuck in the minutiae of the days; who did what and when. It’s easy to be angry and to blame. It’s harder, so much harder, to remember that we are just human. We make mistakes. Forgive, forget, and get over it.

He didn’t intentionally book those appointments so close together on Tuesday. Just like I didn’t intentionally do a bad job on ironing his workshirt, which then almost made him late for work because he had to fix it. (Full admission: I cannot iron worth a damn.)

The important thing is that we try. I make the bed every day, even though I could care less if it’smade or not, because it’s important to him. He often takes the kids and gives me a couple hours to myself. He never questions when I say I need to get my hair done or need time to go out with my girls. (I definitely get more time with my girls than he does with the boys.)

We had been together for three years before we got married. I was pretty sure we had faced the most difficult times before he slipped the ring on my finger. We had bought a house, co-mingled finances, traveled together, and had survived the unexpected loss of my dad.

But ten years has brought more loss, many house moves, career and job changes, and the added stress of children. We have grown and changed a lot in ten years but we have done our best to do this together. We don’t always agree but we do always listen.

Who knows what the next ten years will hold. We will have two teenagers and an almost middle schooler. My husband will be retired and life will most likely look very different than today. But whatever it holds, I am glad to have Jesse by my side. Thank you for overlooking my many faults and for making me a better person. Happy ten years to us!